Questions From My Couch
I got overwhelmed last night and kind of lost it.
Can you "kind of" lose it?
I guess I'm wanting to qualify it to feel better about myself.
On a scale of 1-10, I was at a 7 of losing it.
Suddenly my husband, Robert, wasn't moving fast enough to get the Pueblo West house sold. I'm not even sure how all that entered my mind. I wasn't thinking about it. At least I don't think I was. I wanted to know what steps were going to be taken to get it sold, and I wanted to know right then ... 8:00 pm ... at the end of a long day for both of us.
Sounds like perfect timing, don't you think?
My impatience began to build the day before. Not only are we prepping to sell a house, we are also in the process of buying our first home together. So much busy work is involved in the beginning. Meetings, paperwork, making appointments, phone calls, answering emails, faxing, scanning, uploading. Then there's lots of waiting.
When the busy work is over, all I can do is wait.
There's nothing I can do to make the process go faster or smoother.
I'm not good at the in-between time. The waiting game is not my favorite.
Lord, what do You want to teach me about myself in this? What do you want to say? It's not a new revelation.
God's answer came back as a question to me:
If you get tired while racing against people, how can you race against horses?
If you stumble in a country that is safe, what will you do in the thick thornbushes along the Jordan River? Jeremiah 12:5
The Lord calls me to more, He calls all of us to more. He loves us too much to leave us where we are.
Lord, strengthen me. You have reminded me of Luke 16:10a, "He who is faithful in a very little thing is faithful also in much." In the scheme of life, these are all very little things I'm dealing with. I am only racing against people - myself mostly. I see I get tired in the waiting game because I am racing within myself. I want to prove faithful in the little things so I will not get tired or stumble when I race against horses or dwell among the thick thornbushes. Amen.